it's cold, it's dark, it's cursed...

It all starts without warning, a loved one or trusted authority thrusts a sharp dagger slicing deep into the child's innocent heart shattering its safe world of love with betrayal. A reflex pulls the heart away as the first painful emotion brings a fear of death and insecurity. Stunned in disbelief the child's mind scrambles to make sense of the puncture the heart has just sustained. Confused and unable to comprehend the assault, the child accepts full responsibility. Year after year the pattern continues, as trust becomes a distant memory.

Deep within solitude and far from discovery the mirror of the buried heart reflects failure and loneliness. The mind caught off guard responds with a legion of proof the inner voice is a lie. As time passes and silent to all others, the heart's once small whisper increases to a scream the mind can not suppress. Plunging into a darkness of conviction and despair a knowing of the failure permeates the body. Shocked by the inner betrayal, a rage is created that will not relent. Over and over you seek for the one to blame, but none can be found. Through desperate fear the mind has the solution. You are the one to blame.

The now silent heart slowly dies unaware of its gradual fate as despair trickles into the cold voids where the dream once lived. Day after day the darkness kills thoughts before they transform into action bringing a paralysis to life. Moving deeper and deeper into hopelessness, the childhood dream no longer exists. Replaced with a cold hatred that the song of lies was ever heard. Death is the only escape and love is a lie.

they are just waiting for me to die...

Entries for November, 2004

November 1, 2004

Halloween Posted at 08:09 AM i dunno why i'd post but i just feel like it. hm anyway the day's pretty damn normal.. or i should say boring. i slept the whole day. we won't be going to the cemetery or to the province this all saints day. and my forumer side is back. i got addicted to Tabulas Forums ._.' even though i'm still not 100% myself today, i'm kinda ok compare the last time. i haven't forgotten those problems but i'm not thinking of them for the meantime. and before i leave i would like to say Happy Halloween! even though it's not an official holiday here in the Philippines (we celebrate all saints day, not halloween) till next time me loves Elena... end. 6 memories

November 6, 2004

It's been a year... Posted at 03:45 AM November 6, 2003 at exactly 3:00 am (+8 GMT Manila Time) it's been a year.. even though it's just like yesterday... the time's somewhat slow. even though the road we've been going through's bumpy... and not that smooth... we made it here... and i'm happy to where i am right now... and to what i have... and that's her HAPPY ANNIVERSARY HON!!! i love Elena for a year now and i'll love her for the rest of my life... thanks for staying Hon... end. "I love her because she goes with me regardless of any advantage." -Souichirou Arima [Kare Kano] 5 memories

November 7, 2004

The Promise of an Angel Posted at 07:24 AM i planned on what to type in this post but after reading Hon's latest post... it was superb! i would say it's one of her greatest post she ever made in tabulas! so i scrapped the whole idea.. and came up with something new... but first, i'll tell you what happened earlier... Hon came to the house at already 3pm.. but it's ok though... i still need some sleep... and the bonding of couples after we ate dinner(short dinner actually), we went to mega to buy a gift for our friend.. which is also her birthday the same date as our anniversary. but before that... we just dropped by for the meantime on the eb at the foodcourt... we just say hi to some of our friends after that... we played soul calibur 2, after that we went to our friend... talked about some things... and after that... while on her way home, we dropped by at a convenience store to eat something after getting her home, i went home myself... got home at around 1:45am... even though the way we celebrated's not that grand compare to our (me and hon's) bday, i'm still happy on the results... we didn't see each other for a week... and i really miss her.. so i'm so happy when i saw her again... and besides... this is the first time i ever experienced having a 1st anniversary on relationships.. and luckily... the girl's Hon... so.. i didn't regret anything... all that matters to me is that... we'll always be together... my love for her never ends... thanks to the people who helped us... i don't have any time to say your names individually.. but i will some other time... till next time... me loves Elena infinite times a day! happy anniversary again... i can't wait for next year end. Fukuda Mai's Tenshi No Yubikiri (Kare Kano op) 8 memories

The Jyunishi God

Name: Gerard
Nicks: Son_Gokou, Sohma_Akito, Souichirou_Arima
Status: In a relationship
Likes: Writing and Reading Fanfics, Manga Scans
Hates: Ragnarok Online, PGMA, Liars, Double-Timers, Traitors

How well do you know me?
take my friendtest: click here

The Sohma House

[+]Home
[+]Profile
[+]Gallery
[+]Archives
[+]Links

Tagboard

your name:

url:

your message:

My Fanlistings

Credits

Layout Anime Theme: Fruits Basket
Featuring: Sohma Akito
Layout By: Chibiusa
Brushes: Miss M.
Image: Manga Distribution
Site (c) Akito

Advertisement